I split up from my ex because she had a bad habit of wanting to fight all the time. Not “frequently”, but all the time. Once we had a fifteen hour fight about almost nothing. Every time it came close to being resolved, she’d branch out to another pointless argument that didn’t make sense. It didn’t matter; she wasn’t done fighting yet.
At about 4:15 the next day, I finally got her to agree to a temporary break in the fighting.
What was it all about? Nothing. She just wanted attention and would do anything to get it. I asked a few coworkers if they had been through the same type of drama – and all of them had experienced the same thing. It was becoming more, not less, common.
Before the modern age of bitchiness being elevated to a core value among American women, there used to be a preparation for marriage that included a clear definition of roles.
First, men are very inclined toward aggression and assertiveness. To be married and have a family, a man must keep his aggression in check. He must be reasonable and able to listen and compromise. Since the 1970s, men have learned to do this for the most part. There are still dickhead guys who treat their women badly, but there are a lot less of those.
Second, women are inclined to hysterics and extreme emotion and have to keep that in check if they are going to live with a man or successfully raise male children. Since the 1970s and the advent of pop culture feminism, that is no longer the rule. Women are encouraged to be overly emotional, bitchy and assertive. They are men with no accountability and basically live their lives based on feelings instead of logic.
How does this work in marriage? Well, once my ex got this insane idea that I was cheating on her. It was right during sex. I was on top of her going at it and she accused me of cheating and kept asking if I was “doing” her friend. We had to stop and listen to her vent. When she realized how histrionic and stupid she was being, there was no apology. We just moved on.
I’ve heard other guys talk about their women throwing a huge fit over a misunderstanding, completely ruining someone’s birthday or special event. My own mother used to get upset while we were at a church function or shopping mall about something that popped up in her memory. Instead of addressing the issue later, she was say “Oh yes! I have a bone to pick with you!” and she’d throw a big fit as loudly as possible.
Women have given up on keeping their behavior under control. Sure, they’ll behave when you are dating, but once you are established as a couple and ready to get married, you will want to know what is coming. Again and again, I’ve had incredibly happy and satisfying relationships with hookup girls and women I didn’t live with, but once we became a couple, they cut loose.
There was a time when women knew how to behave to keep a guy. Now they can be as awful as they want to be and their men cannot call them out on it. Men cannot “husband” their women anymore. The law is on her side. She’s in control and she knows with a phone call and a false police report she can have you behind bars before you know it.
You can avoid all this by simply not living with a woman or getting married. It’s a trap. Don’t do it.